Have you ever had a dream to achieve a goal and failed? Who has not? (Only the one who never tried!)
Have you promised yourself (multiple times!) that you will lose those unwanted pounds by a given date only to reach that date and find that you have actually gained a few additional pounds?
Have you committed to arrive on time to the next event you attend – and then found yourself running late again, walking into the conference room after the presenter has begun?
Have you set a bar for the number of sales calls you’ll make and find that you’ve fallen short? What about a decision to respond to a set number of daily e-mails, but instead you find yourself constantly drawn to other urgent tasks?
This week I met a wonderful woman who took one three-hour Max! introductory workshop two years ago, and after just that single session, she had already set herself a goal of becoming a public speaker. This woman really has lot to offer. At that time it seemed that her goal was tangible, and with some work (and network, which she began during our workshop!), it was not a far-off dream; it seemed she would be able to achieve it. To my surprise, when I met her again this week and inquired about her progress, she responded with tears in her eyes. She expressed her frustration with all the obstacles she had met on the road to success: people were critical, she forgot a word and went blank while on stage, etc. Only between the lines was I able to hear some of her success stories (more about the importance of our success stories in a different post). I coached her, giving her time and attention to help her understand what was blocking her, as well as some tips to succeed, and armed her with much love and encouragement. The following quote that we discussed really resonated with her: “Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” – Winston Churchill
Every successful person will tell you about the time when they did not meet their goal or when they were almost ready to give up. And we have all had some experiences of when we pushed ourselves just a bit longer and a bit farther until we found the gold mine of success and achievement.
The question is what keeps us going during those times?
The answer is the “WHY” – why are we trying to achieve our chosen goal?Yes, it is important to set clear goals; this is the “WHAT.” If we do not know where we want to go, the chances of arriving there are very slim! The “HOW” is not that important for us to know when we set our goals. Many times thinking about the “HOW” can scare us and block us from being creative, brave and committed. As we set the “WHAT,” we are actually setting our own personal WAZE: we are programming our destination in the “universe system,” and slowly our Creator will show us the next best step to take, just as WAZE does, 500 feet at a time.
But the “WHY” is so crucial!
Yes, we will still face some challenges (I like to call them opportunities!) along the way.
But if our “WHY” is not that strong, we will not be able to stand it. We will just give up!
Countless times, as I once again packed my suitcases to travel overseas on behalf of Max!, I almost backed out. I constantly ask myself: Why do I do it? Why do I leave a loving family, a comfortable home, a stable lifestyle and exchange it with cramped flights, a cold, impersonal hotel room, juggling all the logistics necessary for my next presentation? Lucky me – my “WHY” is big enough to withstand the doubts.
I see this as my mission. It is my life’s purpose to share what I experienced with other wonderful women across the globe. They all deserve to know what I now know. Each woman can achieve her goals and live the life of her dreams. I am here to serve her and empower her! To let her discover her inner strengths and give her the tools to get from where she has been to where she wants to be! I am here because I am all fired up. Then I become unstoppable. I discovered this wonderful gift that Hashem gave me – and it is no longer mine to keep for myself.
I have had life experience in so many areas: I faced illness and death in my close family. I struggled with being overweight, and Hashem gave me the gift of overcoming it. I was penniless, and Baruch Hashem I have wonderful parnassah today. I have been there in so many ways. The gift of emerging stronger and the tools that I gained along the way are messages that I cannot keep for myself. They are not only for me. I am here to share my life’s experiences and lessons. I am a living proof that it is possible. I am here to empower others, to give them shortcuts to get to the other end – the happy end – in a way that is better, safer and faster. Because when the “WHY” is so strong, you cannot help but forge on.
Take a pen and a paper or your electronic device (more on writing goals in a future post) and write a goal for the coming week. It does not need to be a huge one. It can be anything from any area of your life (personal, interpersonal, spiritual, financial) and write it down (it can be as simple as “Give 3 compliments to Danny daily”).
Think: Why do I want to achieve this goal?
If the reason is not strong enough (i.e., selfish reason: I want to be loved [there are better ways to achieve this], I want my friends to think highly of me, etc.), if it is an external reason that is not empowering you, then scratch it and repeat step 1 with a new goal.
If you feel that the “WHY” is worth it and makes you feel stronger, then write it down.
Do it. And if you wish to share your goal with us so you will feel more committed, let us be your empowerment group.
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